Astrology can help us understand more about ourselves and the people we love/date/hopelessly crush on—no matter their gender. For more deets on Virgo compatibility, check out our guide to dating a Virgo woman and our gender-neutral guide to dating a Virgo.
There are just a few basics that need to be explored when you first start dating someone. Where are they from? What do they do for a living? Oh, and most definitely, when’s their birthday? This isn’t just for remembering when to send that “happy b-day :)” text! Knowing a potential boo’s zodiac sign can really help in understanding their behavior. Astrology helps us break down personality traits, pet peeves, and, yes, even dating patterns. It can be fun and informative to look up their sign and see how yours works with it (aka compatibility).
If you’re dating, Insta-sleuthing (hi, guilty), or just fantasizing over a Virgo man (born August 23 to September 22, btw), we’re here to help you. Virgos tend to be reserved and guarded, so it can be hard to get to know them at first—but once you do, you’ll discover a dark, hilarious sense of humor and one of the most loyal friends you’ll ever meet.
Virgos men might be intimidating bc they seem so perfect, but unlike some signs (cough cough, Leo), they’re not full of themselves. In fact, they’re just as critical of themselves as they are of others. Although yeah, many of them do love to organize things! Virgo is represented by the “virgin,” but don’t trust the name—as earth signs, Virgos are sensual AF. Although they seem innocent, they might have some kinks they’ll tell you about when they know they can trust you.
If Virgo men seem confusing, luckily, astrology allows us to decipher personality traits, pet peeves, and so much more. And trust me when I say, there is sooo much more to a Virgo man than you initially realized. Read on because we’ve got the deets on all things Virgo!
The Virgo Basics
Birthday: August 23 to September 22
Modality: Mutable
Element: Earth
Ruling planet: Mercury
Represented by: The virgin or the maiden
Tarot card: The Hermit
Keywords: Dedicated, attentive, high-strung, helpful, hardworking, perfectionist, sensual, organized, detail-oriented, smart, ambitious
Best traits: Smart, sensual, detail-oriented, hard-working, focused on ~you~
Worst traits: Perfectionist, cold, judgmental, shy
Love anthem: “Virgo’s Groove” by Beyoncé
Famous Virgo men: Idris Elba, Keanu Reeves, Nick Jonas, Freddie Mercury, Chris Pine, Colin Firth, Alexander Skarsgård, Bernie Sanders, Dave Chapelle, John Mulaney, Jungkook, Prince Harry, Jason Derulo, Tyler Perry, Adam Sandler, Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Tom Hardy, Hugh Grant, Blair Underwood, Billy Porter, Bernie Sanders
A Virgo Man’s Best Traits
Virgo is one of the hardest-working, ambitious signs of the zodiac, and when they turn their attention on you, it’s like nothing else. These ~angels~ were born to serve their lover. They remember every detail about you, whether it’s your coffee order or just where you like your neck kissed. As earth signs, they’re super-sensual and have a bit of a kinky side.
A Virgo Man’s Worst Traits
So, Virgo’s perfectionism can be used for good or evil. You love it when they’re using it to please you in bed….but when they’re judging how clean your kitchen is? It’s not so fun. At their worst, Virgo can be judgmental nit-pickers, which is not so fun to be around. Their shy nature also means they can come off as cold, especially if you don’t know them well yet.
The Best Matches for a Virgo Man
Fellow earth sign Taurus is a great match for a Virgo. You both respect each other’s forwardness and work ethic—and you have a nose for quality. Similarly, Virgo vibes with earth sign Capricorn, as they both prioritize hard work, are ambitious AF, and have a secret kinky side. Basically, earth signs just ~get~ each other.
Water sign Cancer is another great match for a Virgo. Where Virgo takes care of practical matters and shows affection by helping with IRL stuff, Cancer is an emotional water sign and creates an intimate and loving connection. Together, you make a great team. And Virgos can also be great matches for another water sign, Scorpio. They both are deep thinkers who value alone time, and they have similar communication styles. They’re also both super-sleuths who can dig up info about anyone/anything, anytime.
Finally, Virgo vibes well with their opposite sign, Pisces. Both are all about helping others, but dreamy Pisces can help logical Virgo loosen up a bit while Virgo can help Pisces stay grounded.
The Worst Matches for a Virgo Man
So, Gemini and Sagittarius will have to put in extra work to woo a Virgo. Y’all are just so different! Gemini is sooo talkative that Virgo can get irritated, so it’s important for Gems to remember to give Virgo their much-needed alone time. Adventurous Sagittarius can find Virgo’s carefulness to border on neurotic, while Virgo can get stressed-out by Sag’s impulsivity. These two signs will need to find a balance between making a five-year-plan and deciding to go on a road trip without a map or destination.
However, if you’re a Gem or a Sag, you can still vibe with a Virgo—especially if their Moon signs or another part of your birth chart are compatible. But even if your birth chart is Gemini all the way down, if you make an effort to understand your Virgo boo—and vice versa—you can have a great relationship too. And TBH, ~astrological tension~ can also lead to ~sexual tension~, so there’s something to be said for “incompatibility”!
Sex With a Virgo Man
Like I said, just because they’re represented by the virgin or the maiden doesn’t mean Virgos aren’t into sex. In fact, as earth signs, Virgos are all about pleasure. They’re also ruled by Mercury, planet of communication, which means they tend to be fans of dirty talk, sexting, and thinking up elaborate role-play scenes. Just make sure you use the right your when you’re telling your Virgo exactly what you’re gonna do to him when he gets home!
Virgos tend to put their loved ones’ needs above their own, so life in the bedroom is up in the air until you set the rhythm. Once he gets the hang of what you like and don’t like, he’ll take your idea of pleasure to a whole new level! As a mutable sign, he’s adaptable and quick on his feet and can keep up with your tempo after a couple rounds in bed. He loves trying new things and finds it choose to have a favorite sex position—they’re just all so fun! He’s ridiculously attentive both inside and outside of the bedroom—he’s the type of guy who takes you out for dinner, stacks the dishes for the waiter, and can’t wait to kiss you goodbye!
One note: Virgos tend to be really focused on cleanliness, so make sure you don’t have any crumbs in your sheets before you get between them—and maybe take a shower before your Virgo boo comes over. Or hey, jump in the shower together for even more fun.
The Perfect Date with a Virgo Man
There are two ways you can go here: Appeal to your Virgo’s mind or appeal to his ~senses~. Virgo is known for being very analytical, insightful, and just plain smart, so try taking him on a date that keeps his intellect active—like attending a podcast taping together, visiting a science museum, or watching an art film. On the other hand, remember that Virgo is an earth sign, which means he’s particular in touch with his ~senses~. Take him on a date that stimulates his sense of touch, taste, sight, sound, or smell—or better yet, several of the above—like a trip to botanical gardens, a spa, or a delicious restaurant.
A Relationship with a Virgo Man
After you DTR with a Virgo man, expect to basically be waited on hand and foot. These guys naturally focus on their partner’s pleasure, in the bedroom and everywhere else too. However, they expect greatness from their S.O.s, too—so hopefully you’re cleaning up your home before they come over *and* you remember their fave takeout order.
A Virgo Man in Love
Do you remember how three months ago, you were window-shopping and you saw a necklace you loved? Yeah, Virgo remembered that remark, saved up, and then bought it to surprise you with for your birthday. That’s Virgo’s perfectionism used for love.
A Virgo Man at Home
You might think a Virgo’s home might be hyper-organized, but it’s just as likely that his mind is so busy that his home is kind of, well, a mess…or he might prefer the term “organized chaos.” You might not know where to find anything, but he does! Virgo is one of the more guarded zodiac signs, so it make take him a few dates before he feels comfy enough to invite you over. When you do, ignore the overflowing laundry hamper and compliment him on his bookshelf or record collection.
A Virgo Man at the Office
Everyone appreciates a Virgo’s attention to detail. He’s the one doing the final copy edit, taking minutes at important meetings, and writing incredibly thorough plans/mission statements/presentations/etc. As a “service-oriented” sign of the zodiac, Virgo is great on a team. They know how to collaborate!
A Virgo Man with Friends
Like most earth signs, Virgos are the friend everyone can rely on! They’re the one taking the lead when it comes to organizing happy hours and group vacations, and they’re the ones who you call when you’re going through a crisis or just need someone to listen to you vent about your boss or your annoying coworker. Just one warning: Virgos are always trying to improve everything and everyone around them, so don’t ask them for advice unless you’re ready to hear some tough love!
A Gift for a Virgo Man
Virgos are nothing if not practical, so get them something they can actually use! If they’re into cooking, buy them some new pots and pans, spices, or glassware. If they’re into music, buy them concert tickets or new headphones. If they’re into travel, buy them a fancy new suitcase or a portable phone charger and passport cover. You get the picture!
All About Virgo Men
Virgo is number 6 of 12 on the zodiac wheel and the only mutable earth sign—meaning he’s resourceful and flexible as well as logical, stubborn, and concerned only with what’s tangible. He’s a shy, sensitive dude, but as a sign ruled by Mercury, he’s also pretty clever and ambitious, and he just has a way with words. His sign is the most associated with servitude–he wants to take care of his S.O. above anything else and shows affection in practical ways like helping you with a project, doing the dishes, or just neatening parts of your life to make it easier. His preferred relationship is quiet and private, where most of the action happens at home, but he still wants to show you off to everyone he knows!
He’s pretty low-key and not a super-flirtatious dude, and as a smart Mercury-ruled sign, his brain works at 100 miles a minute to make sure everything is just right. He does a lot of behind-the-scenes work for you, and sometimes you might not even notice everything he does for the relationship. He is effective at communicating but can be a bit cut-and-dried, so he’s more aligned with Mercury’s intellectual side. He’s also witty as hell, so he’s sure to make you laugh. He wants to listen and learn everywhere he goes, and he especially wants to know as much about you as possible! And trust, he’ll remember every. single. detail. you tell him—so don’t tell any white lies!
Being the perfectionist that he is, Virgo wants nothing less than the best of the best. That’s how you know he likes you—he wouldn’t be with you if he didn’t think you were the closest thing to perfection out there. The keywords there are “closest thing” to perfection. He wants to be with someone who looks and plays the role of the best relationship partner one could wish for, so he’s always taking time out of his own busy schedule to help you out. All you have to do is thank him—and be sincere about it—and he’s overjoyed.
His need for perfection can be a blessing and a curse. He’s fussy and needlessly particular over literally everything. Even though he’s ruled by the planet of communication, his way of conveying his point isn’t the nicest. It all comes from a good place, sure, but every day, you’re left wondering if he’ll ever give it a rest and just take that stick out of his ass for once! During the best of times, you find that your relationship is operating efficiently and beautifully, but on the bad days, you want to rip your hair out. If you ask your Virgo BF to read over your resume for you, he will have at least a dozen edits—so don’t ask him unless you really wanna know!
Virgo is all about details. He’s likely to notice how you take your coffee and fix you a perfect cup for your third date. Mention a book you’ve been meaning to read? Virgo might surprise you with a copy in a few weeks. There’s a downside to this precision though. Virgo will remember every detail of every fight, and he won’t let you pretend you weren’t wrong about something if you really were.
Your Virgo man can be a pretty big hypocrite too. His home is a pigsty, but he rolls his eyes if you have a single dirty dish in your sink. And if he feels like it’s been too long since he’s felt appreciated, watch out. Next time he does your laundry or takes out your trash, there’s a passive-aggressive comment he mutters under his breath. On top of being critical, he’s pretty sensitive too! He’s easily terrified to be anything less than 100 percent perfect. His next thought is that you’ll leave him, so he can get pretty clingy. But 9 times out of 10, you can keep everything relaxed and stable just by reassuring him of your affection.
The key to making the whole relationship work is to BE DIRECT. His ruling planet is all about communication, so he knows how to listen and can vocalize his thoughts easily. He’ll tell you if he has a problem in a split second, and you should do the same! Open communication is never a bad thing, and with Virgos, it’s an expectation. Also, lift him up when you can. He’ll dedicate a lot of time to you, your job, your social life, pretty much everything. Show interest in his hobbies, ask his opinion, and be proactive about making him feel not only noticed but also appreciated. If you can do that, it’ll be smooth sailing.
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Jake Register (better known by his Instagram handle, @jakesastrology) is a Libra and the author of Cosmopolitan’s weekly Sexoscopes. He lives in southeastern North Carolina and loves making astrology content. Follow his IG or Twitter @jakesastrology, and to book a reading, go to Jakesastrology.as.me.