The Mmmelter
Make shower sex workable with something to hang onto to get yourselves where you need to be. Press yourself tightly into the corner while they hang on to the handles, propping their foot up on the footrest to get in deep and close. Kind of like spooning while standing, but more intense. (If you accidentally leave the foot rest up, it’s good for shaving your legs too).
Be true to yourself and your partner with what you’re feeling this season and you’ll have exactly the kind of holiday loving you want, need, and deserve. And, as promised, here are some extra special positions to put the ho ho ho in your holidays.
Mix edible flavored lubes like a MFing lube artisan. For a coffee lover, turn yourself into a coffee house with dollops salted caramel, cinnamon bun, blueberry and/or vanilla bean. Or create a makeshift appletini (lil shot of vodka for them, followed by a dollop of candy apple on your boobs). Don’t forget to return the favor, since this is supposedly a gift for them, after all.
12 Days of Sexy is like an Advent calendar, but instead of mediocre chocolates, each little compartment is filled with a sexy toy, like a blindfold, a diamond-shaped vibrator (fancy!) or the MAZE Tassel Choker that doubles as a whip. Treat yourself every day, and then some.
Warm and Bothered
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The Shake It
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The Big Present
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If you like things wet (no further questions), get yourself a lush throw that lets you get as messy as you want and ensures no one gets left with the sad, cold wet spot. Pick a blanket side (velvet microfiber or satiny), then lube the hell out of each other. Seriously, drench yourselves till you can barely hang onto each other. Lie on top of your partner, chest to chest, and slide back and forth, trying to keep them inside you while rubbing your clit on their pelvic bone.
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Arousal gels and creams help focus your attention and increase sensations. Try an arousal cream with a little bit of menthol, cinnamon, or mint (seasonal!)—penises, nipples, and vulvas read the tingliness as arousal. (Some can be a bit much on tender bits, so start off with a wee amount and be ready to flee to the shower if it’s less sexy and more burny.) Get a selection and try them out by dabbing them on slowly for maximum buildup.
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What better time of year to play dress up in bed than Christmas? Have your partner dress up as Santa (at least their top half) as you let them hear how good you’ve been this year. “Sit sideways on your partner’s lap with your arms around their neck to try the Santa’s lap position,” says Marsha Jackson, a sex counselor who specializes in queer and gender fluid people. “As they penetrate you from underneath, use your sexy whisper to tell them what you really want to find under the tree for Christmas.” (If you’re really into it, spring for the extra Santa accessories. Santa rubbing you with his gloved hand? White beard + oral? Yes please!)
Santa Claus Is Cuming
All Wrapped Up
Lord of the Ring
Use Christmas lights or tinsel to (carefully) tie each other up. “I love doing shibari bondage with Christmas lights and decorations so I can wrap and unwrap my own sexy presents!” says Miss Couple, an intimacy and relationship coach. If you’re not quite at Shibari-levels of expertise, try DIY holiday-themed light bondage using gift ribbons as wrist bindings or a cardboard gift wrap tube as a spreader bar.
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Feel the warmth of the season by slipping into luxe warm bath, then slowly soaping each other up. When you absolutely must have each other (or are just getting too wrinkly), wrap up in robes then head to bed. Keep your robes on and just open them in front for cozy missionary. “Since our bodies are responsive to heat, consider using a warming lubricant,” says Jess O’Reilly, PhD, resident sexologist at Astroglide. And if you really want to get kinky, put some socks on. “Research suggests that women are more likely to have an orgasm if our feet are warm, so leave your boots, socks or slippers on,” she says.
A Novel Evening
Go big with a jumbo kit of couples toys. Take turns picking one or two things out a night and figuring out how to have your way with them. Wrist cuffs + internal stimulation? A vibrating stroker and a blindfold? Hmmmm…so many possibilities.
For a pretty broad hint that you’d like to go BDSMing, spring for a big ol’ box of toys. Test it out with one of you lying face down with your wrists bound via cuffs. Try a few flicks with the flogger and go from there. Pleasure/pain mixes work best, ie., ice followed by your warm mouth, or a smart smack, then a gentle caress. (If you’re not feeling spendy, put together a starter BSDM kit with a spanking tool, blindfold, and soft restraints in a fancy box from the dollar store.)
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منبع
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You can also let go of the idea that you need to have Hallmark Christmas movie-level romance. “Don’t take it personally if things don’t go exactly as planned,” says Fehr. Too tired? F*ck it (or don’t!) and just go to bed snuggling. “You might have enough energy to wake up in the middle of the night for some passionate love-making,” says Fehr. “Or do it in the morning, when you’re both full of energy and desire for each other. Hold things loosely and roll with it.”
Trust us when we say there is fun to be had with a wand vibrator. Most clit owners know the glory of the wand, but if your partner has a penis, let them in on its powers by having them stand at the edge of the bed, pressing the wand into the base of their shaft to create a Magical Vibrating Penis for you and some serious throbs for them.
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The 12 Days Craze
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Wanna get it on but feel super awk doing it at your parents’ house? Two words: shower sex. Give your partner the gift of waterproof sex toys by putting together a gift basket full of ’em and putting them to good use. “Join your honey in the shower (perhaps to sneak away while staying with relatives) and allow the heat to build between your bodies,” says O’Reilly. “Kneel at their feet for a hot oral session or sit in one another’s laps for rear entry. Be sure to keep a silicone lube on hand to keep things slick and slippery between your bodies.”
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